Ah! That's a hot question that keeps coming up in sessions lately. As many countries start to share stories of reopening, many people are wondering if there might be something wrong with them for enjoying their time in lockdown.
To be clear, nobody is saying that they like the destruction and pain caused by a global pandemic. Nobody is without empathy and compassion for those suffering.
What they are saying is that they have now experienced working at an internally regulated natural pace. That they are able to appreciate not having days that felt like they were spinning like a top between different drops and picks, getting frustrated in traffic, eating random food, and running late for appointments.
Instead, they find themselves spending time cooking real meals and permitting themselves the so-called luxury to just be and not be expected to be doing something. Finding themselves taking time to contemplate responses and projects.
People have had space to absorb the gratitude they feel for what's around them.
They have a better understanding of who and what really matters to them. Who is there for them and who they want to be there for. And...who they want to be and who they are. In an odd way it sounds like people are being given the power to choose.
Simply experiencing the routine, stability, consistency of following their own rhythm and flow.
And that has actually been beneficial to their relationships with themselves, others, and their mental health!
Well, Bravo then! In my humble opinion - yes I think it's completely fine to feel gratitude for a crisis that brought you back to yourself.
What it makes me wonder about though - is if these circumstances have shown you what life is like with boundaries? How many people have told me they were relieved to spend holidays at home surrounded by those in their bubble? Freed of expectations and the weight of "the show".
What if we all had better boundaries - to be able to say yes and mean it and to say no with grace and respect from those whom we love. I dream of a day when we don't need a global pandemic to remind people of the value of slowing down, conquering anxiety and depression, to uphold their own values and boundaries.
But until then...like away!
Farah Kurji (BSW, MSW, RCSW, YTT, EMDR CIT) is an advanced trained clinician specializing in trauma, loss, anxiety, and depression. She includes EMDR & CBT amongst her treatment modalities. Farah also provides clinical consultations and debriefing. You can book with her or her team HERE.